May 18, 2009

mixed emotion

after my reading session tonight,i have some urge to blog.though it just my crappiness but somehow i felt like i need to write something here.due to the change of my layout,it is pretty clear that maybe i am in a EMO mood.but not sad,just some unpleasant feeling in my tummy.sometimes i even fell homesick.and i don't even stay in hostel or living outside of KL.*sigh*
then suddenly i realized something,i actually missed my friends,especially,we went for dinner nearby my school and i saw the path that i usually take when i was coming back from school.and suddenly my mind doing its own flashbacks.funny.felt like i am not ready for college life yet.but however,life must go on and i must adapt.chaiyok-chaiyok!!!
lately i even kinda ignore my boyfriend.sorry k dear???
i need sometime to adjust and finally accept the reality.
i am still very much grateful for having such wonderful new friends which i appreciate very much.
back then,i am the kind of person who doesnt really tolerate with changes.especially those drastic changes.but the irony is,now i am the one who need to face/make those changes.really feel weary rite now.i kept wondering what my other friends are doing rite more factor that drove me to write today is because today i saw/bumped into one of my old friend at school.he really look different,sad,matured and somehow tired.despite all that,he still have that charming smile of his.and i couldn't help wondering what happen to the others.the i felt guilty.arghh.hate in positive psychology,we learn about positive and negative emotion can combine and become the ultimate feelings.then she talk about knowing ourselves from within.i mean,DEEP inside of us.*sigh* that's hard cz it always been a really BIG problem/disability for me to do so.OMG,do i need therapy??haha.oukayys,need to typed-off now.till then.....

No comments: